My name is just a jumble of letters

Staring long enough at my name, going through font after font, looking for just the right one to convey - well - modern, jazzy, classy, sad (because of the title of the new CD) but not defeated, strong and yet vulnerable, to make it fit in with the picture I finally chose after agonizing over which way to go with the cover design for weeks, making it a bit larger, a bit smaller, a bit lighter or darker, grayer, less gray, with or without raindrops in the backdrop of the picture, sooner or later I arrive at the moment, where I have stared at my name long enough for it to lose any meaning. For it to look utterly wrong in any context. What an odd word - Lohninger - what does it mean, if anything? (I await your letters...)